For seven years now, between health and geopolitical crises and dazzling technological changes, upheavals and uncertainties have continued to pose difficulties for leaders. Forced to react in record time to the unforeseen events of a constantly accelerating world, they had to learn to control themselves to protect their company and their employees. Emotions overwhelm us whether we like it or not, because they are inherent to being human. Today more than ever, acquiring self-control remains essential for the manager or leader. So how to acquire it?
The entrepreneur or manager, given his mission, is constantly subject to strong emotions:
- a client who represents the deal of the century,
- another who goes to competition,
- cash flow tensions,
- the resignation of a key employee,
- an error, a technical bug,
- new regulations which require massive investment,
- or a colleague who arouses anger (sometimes with or without reason).
In short, all these little grains of everyday sand can lead you to lose control… Joy, despair: there are many emotions. But how can you master them, for yourself and for others?
Certainly, can you really deny your anger or your suffering when your unconscious pushes you to react because your integrity is called into question and your limits have been crossed?
However, everyone knows: in the professional world, emotions still often appear as a manifestation of weakness. Whether from colleagues, who consider that the person expressing them does not know how to channel themselves, or from your own point of view, thinking that you are showing a flaw. You then fear that this will serve to call into question your skills, which arouses fear in you.
Clearly, you would like to keep control of your feelings and manage your emotions, including anger, but you sometimes think that this is a task beyond your strength.
So, what to do?
To be able to control your anger, you must first analyze the reasons that lead you to let it express itself:
- Injustice, provocation, threat;
- The feeling of being crushed by a personality, frustration;
- The fact of feeling victim or, conversely, of feeling superior;
- A person you can’t stand because of their behavior, or simply because they seem to be at odds with your values and your way of being.
Ask the problem and prepare your answers
Raising the problem before meeting the people with whom you have a dispute or disagreement, and preparing your answers, will help control your anger. In this case, you develop the ability to not let your words overtake your thoughts. You will thus avoid hurting the other and fueling the escalation of the conflict.
Without even realizing it, you will nuance your words, you will choose the appropriate vocabulary and you will replace it with conciliatory words. Anger does not give you all the rights. Despite your exasperation, you must learn to control the words youus use.
The key tip: Respecting others by putting yourself in their place will instill in you the ability to keep your cool. But above all, avoid criticism from colleagues or another department, and do not pour out your feelings to calm downr. You would lose all credibility.
In conclusion, you should not blame others. As a business owner, you are responsible – and responsible for your own control. Keeping calm, patience and self-control are essential qualities, and you know it well.
